Remember

to be:

• slow. No urgency. No hurry. Be cool and get things done in your pace.
• YOU.
  
• feeding a variety of things to your mind. Start reading a lot of fiction and watching a lot of different movies. You make your mind more flexible with that.
• Love what you do.
• sane in your mind. Don't imagine stupid things. Keep yourself busy most of the time so that your mind does not digress.
• Meditate and become stress free. Emotional fatigue is the cause of all problems.
  

Habits

I find that I am, now-a-days, starting to incorporate some good habits. Some of them are:

• Get up in the morning, on an average, at 6:30 AM
• Do exercise daily
• Stop eating junk food to an extent
• Stop drinking tea too much
• Eat nuts and seeds at night for dinner

I find this as a positive change. I have to do it more so that I can inculcate them into my lifestyle permanently.

But, I find one thing eating too much of my time and energy. It is too much self-consciousness. Another one is Ostentatiousness. I cannot seem to be without these for a consistent 10 minutes, which is very sad. What should I do to completely get away from it? Of course, I will have to progressively get away from it.

For the moment, I really don't see any solutions. But, I will sit on this one. I will think about it intensively and finally find some way out.

One way is to really focus on the subject at hand, contemplate what Atanu said (for every hour I spend, I will have to spend many more hours to really understand what I should learn from it) and apply it in this context.

Disappointment

Disappointment comes from either expecting too much from the self and not getting it or not committed enough to achieve the things planned. Disappointment comes from the sudden appearance of unexpected things and our sporadic reaction to them. This can take many forms. A seemingly unfitting one would be to have idle time, seek out things randomly, see/experience an unexpected one and behave sporadically. An idle mind (not able to see what next) is also a cause of disappointment. Spinning things in mind without getting them done is another cause for disappointment. Every time if comes to the mind, it reminds us that we are the same old person that we used to be and that there is no apparent change. The things can be anything. It can be bad habits, it can be fears, it can be pending todo things, it can be inferiority complexes, it can be bad memories so on and so forth. Of all disappointment comes from the lack of emotional intelligence. Our ability, or rather our inability, to respond appropriately to an impulse. The impulses are the ones that are mentioned above. The response is disappointment. So long as our response it bad, bad things cherish in our minds. Some way has to be found to change our response. One has to create a really good state of things(us, our things, our people) and convert all our responses to impulses as leading to our desired state. In that way all our thoughts, feelings always create positive energy in our minds as well as body. The challenge lies in taking all the seemingly (with the current state of mind) negative things and convert them (or rather reconfigure our minds' neural networks) to look like positive things ending up with a grin on the face. It is like using the same neural networks to change themselves. That is the power of consciousness. I will have to start thinking about these reconfigurations.

Emotional Intelligence

I have seen many books/articles/whatever that talk about emotional intelligence a lot and say that it is very important for success etc. But I have seen not a single source which talks about what to do, when things shove i.e. when without our consciousness, we tend to be taken over by our emotions wanting to meet some urge. At that time, our neo-cortex seems to lay dormant, not able to take control. What happens exactly at that moment? How do we get into doing those same things again? - the answer is naturally. Because, you were doing it till yesterday, you will do it today also. And if you don't resist it, you will do it tomorrow also. Probably it is as simple as that.

When the emotions are taking us up, hypnotizing us and letting us into doing what it wants to do, something has to be done. One rule of thumb is that if one can't find a generic solution, take up special cases and handle them separately. Eventually, you may find a pattern.

That said, I am tempted to write some general thoughts about it. :-) Whenever we are about to decide (either voluntarily or involuntarily) to do something that we regret later doing it, it is because of a lot of factors:

• As already said, it is because you have been doing it.
• The first thing is to become conscious about the fact that you are about to be entrapped.
• The next thing is to try to resist it. It can be through many ways:
• Through will power. It ceased to work for me.
• Through diversion. You strongly focus on something else that you completely forget about the current urge to give into it.
• Through reasoning. This is the most professional way of preventing one from giving into it, IMO. But it is very subjective. I mean, what reasons are you going to give? Say, take that habit for example. The moment has come when you started feeling the urge to give into it because you envisioned, heard, saw, touched, felt something that has invoked those hormones and is compelling you to go for it. What do you do? Emotions have completely taken control over you. Will you even have the consciousness to realize that you can invoke reason to get away from it?

What a beauty is it!! Emotions give control to reason and reason, once takes control, can tune emotions. How do we harness the power of it?

Office time

I was thinking that I, on an average, spend about an hour for teas/lunch/snacks/breakfast. If I stay in office from 10 AM to 6 PM i.e. for 8 hours, then 7 hours will be my work time. In that, if I work for 4 to 4.5 hours, the rest 2 to 2.5 hours will be for me to do some other work - lets say it is purely MissionA work. For that I need to collect somethings and read them during those times. I have created a tag called officeBreak in del.icio.us so that I can pick one and start reading them.

My timings for reading officeBreak items are:

• 10 to 12:30 PM is office work.
• 12:30 to 1 PM is officeBreak work.
• 1:45 to 2:30 PM is officeBreak work.
• 2:30 to 4:30 PM is office work.
• 4:30 to 5:00 PM is officeBreak work.
• 5:30 to -- is office work.

The Persistent Vision

I want to understand the world. I want to explain the world in my own terms. I want to propagate critical thinking in this world. Because I know that is how the world can be saved from our own insanity. I also know that I must be the change I wish to see in this world. I myself want to become a critical thinker. I want to become a brilliant, systemic thinker. I want to show by example how the world can prosper and things can improve by doing responsible and critical thinking. I can show that only by becoming a teacher. I want to be a teacher. Because I think that is where the true sharing of knowledge and more importantly wisdom takes place. I got it from a lot of my (direct or indirect) teachers.

I want to become one, but for that I need to improve myself. The current avatar of me is an avatar where I am being a Paarth asking questions, interpreting answers and understanding the world. There are a lot of Krishnas in this world from whom I learn. To me, everybody is a Krishna. I learn something from everybody. All the Krishnas teach me silently by doing, acting, talking, behaving. They all teach me either how to do something or how not to do something. Whether it be charm, courage or love or whatever, I learn a bit from everybody and everything - be it an object. I am in search of my knowledge and wisdom. I am constantly exploring my limits and pushing them. While all this is taking place, I am very cool. I am persistent. I know that true learning is not a trivial activity and that I need to be patient. I know that the bigger, better and wiser self is always just a second away from me. I am not overwhelmed by the vast amount of information or knowledge in front of me. I know that a man cannot learn all by himself. I also know that it is the basic principle behind all these specialized economies which has created miracles. I am in search of my specialized knowledge tree. I have not yet come to terms with it, but I know that I am going to, one day. I am like Socrates, always questioning. I never stop questioning and only by questioning, I like to pass on knowledge and wisdom.

I always wears a smile on my face, that reflects the peace inside me. That small, simple and great smile acknowledges my humbleness, my dignity, my maturity, my aplomb, my confidence, and my patience.

I meditate very deeply. I reunite with all of my energies during the meditation and becomes energetic. Whenever I see myself in a mirror, I get reminded of the fact that I have been sent down for a mission and I need to find it with full self-discipline.

I eat healthy foods and avoid junk food. I eat a lot of vegetables and fruits and nuts and seeds. I exercise daily. Every morning, I get up and deeply breathe. I then sit for about a couple of minutes, cools my waking evils, smiles and then starts the ritual.

Whenever a negative thought comes to my mind, I acknowledge that only through suffering that true growth happens. I asks what is it that I have to learn from those set of thoughts and how am I going to incorporate the newly realized knowledge.

I am very persistent in asking questions. I know that only questions can unlock the whole wealth of knowledge that is hidden from the human mind. So I persist in asking different kinds of questions, until the task gets done. I understand the importance of questions and respects them a lot.

I come along, have a majestic gait. I focus on anything like a laser. When I talk, I talk clearly, to the point and with an authoritative voice. I am very conscious about the things happening around me and am an astute observer. I plan everything properly and does the work accordingly. I have a very strong muscle body. I sit straight. I look like Michael Mukherjee. I am very courageous. I am not afraid of the little things. I am very confident. I believe in myself completely. I am fast, dynamic. I quickly grasp things, though at times I am slow only to understand things properly. I strongly believe in "Do whatever you are doing perfectly" philosophy. My schedule is like a black hole. Everything can go into it. I do a lot of things, yet after all done, I am still active, kicking and screaming with a lot of enthusiasm. I am not moved by the small little hyped things happening around me. I do everything properly and with full discipline. I have minimum common sense and expects the same from others. I see fun in everything I do. I care a lot about the nation. I never waste time. I keep thinking about something because I have a lot of things that I do not know and keep asking questions about them.

Beyond Positive thinking, 2

The future can only be changed by our thoughts and actions in the present.

Seize the day and put as little trust as you can in the morrow.

Unfinished business is a drain on your mental resources and a major source of time wasting worry.

For yesterday is a dream, and tomorrow is only a vision; But today well lived makes every yesterday a dream of happiness and every tomorrow a vision of hope. Look well therefore to this day!

Your thoughts and actions inevitably create your future as well as your past.

Many people find that they are able to write about life events and feelings which they are much less happy to talk about. Write all of them down, which makes you feel less happy, regularly.

The only place where past still has any reality is in your mind.

If we could develop our abilities to remember all these sensations - the visual, the auditory, the kinesthetic - equally well, and choose which memories to recall at our will, how much richer will our lives be?

When you are immersed in it, depression does not seem to be like a choice. It feels much more like being "taken over" by something over which you have little or no control.

What activities of feelings have given you the greatest feelings of self-worth? Where are the good feelings, associated with them, located in the body?

The events of our lives are just things that happen. They only have a meaning, if we decide to give them one and we can choose what they mean. Each event only has the meaning you have decided to attach to it.

Empowering set of questions

• How could I use possibility questions to increase my creativity
• What must I do to make sure I remember this?
• How could I find new ways to enjoy being my true self?
• What must I do to feel good about myself.
• What new beliefs could be most useful to me?
• Which beliefs do I most need to change?
• How could I put more attention on my highest values?
• What do I need to do about this right now?
• How could I most enjoy developing new habits?
• What must I do to have more empowering thoughts?
  
• How can I easily let go of the past?
  
• What must I do to create a happy and inspiring future?
• When could writing my thoughts down be most useful?
• What must I do to remember to let go of less-than-useful feelings?
• How could I most easily release old feelings?
• What must I do to feel fulfilled?
• What new meanings can I find for things that I used to feel bad about?
• Which beliefs are most helpful to me right now?
  
  

I want

• to be a normal person
• to be always happy
• to feel always good
• to be with people as much as possible
• to be courageous
• to be fully confident of me
• to be free from "it".
• to focus on things other than me
• to be strong and muscled
• to be a clean, nice faced perclson
• to be able to concentrate on a thing for a long time
• to feel superior about myself
• to be free of my egotistic feelings
• to be active and vibrant
• to care for my near and dears
• to care for myself
• to be completely responsible for myself
• to see order and discipline in my life
• to be able to see and show what I am
• to be determined about my course of actions
• to believe in things only after careful judgement
• to be a very critical thinker
• to be a creative thinker
• to be able to socialize freely
• to be frank about my thoughts and actions w.r.t others
• to make decisions for myself aptly and quickly
• to have a good, empowering world view
• to respect all people and their opinions irrespective of who they are
• to get emotional with people at needy times
• to be open minded and willing to learn anything from anybody
• to mingle with people very easily
• to have some solid goals and a specific direction in my life
• to be a mature person giving right importance to things at right times
• to have reasonable expections about myself by consciously recognizing my capabilities at any given point of time.

I am

• an autist
• a melancholic
• am depressed
• feel lonely
• fearful
• not confident
• an addict
• too self conscious
• fat
• ugly faced
• always wandering
• feel inferior
• feel too much high about myself always
• am lazy
• have a wavering mind
• dont care for near and dears
• dont care for myself
• irresponsible about my future
• a mess
• an ostentatious person
• travel with the direction of wind
• believe in everything
• not a critical thinker
• not a creative thinker
• lacking in social intelligence
• a hesitant person
• indecisive most of the times
• not having a good world view
• am rude towards some people whom I dont like
• not emotional
• not open minded
• cannot mingle with people easily
• a person with no goals or direction
• immature
• have too much expectations about myself w.r.t output and performance

Beyond Positive thinking

A book, that I have started to read just today. So far, so good, but I have to do the exercises in the first chapter. I will thoroughly capture the salient points in the first chapter Who are You?:

The first chapter by asking that question, kind of makes you reveal the following things:

• Your thoughts and feelings about yourself
• Your beliefs
• Your values
• Your habits
  

Real security not lies in possessions or with people, but in the knowledge that whatever happens, you can deal with it.

Beliefs are a matter of choice. They can be held quite independently of facts. Choosing which beliefs to have is largely a matter of selecting suitable evidences from your experience of life.

The mind and body are part of the same system. If you change your mind, you change your body. If you change your body, you change your mind.

What you focus on, will increase in your life.

There is no such thing as a failure. There is only feedback.

Long term success requires commitment.

Self-empowerment means feeling in control of your key elements of life, being able to make sound and effective decisions, being clear about your core values, being able to create and maintain worthwhile relationships, having most of your attention on the present, dealing confidently with challenges.

Repitition with belief is one of the master keys to personal development.

The empowering questions are of two types: possibility questions and necessity questions which open up the thinking process and direct them respectively.

Your mind-body cannot tell the difference between a real event and a vividly-imagined one, so one can take that to advantage.

The way you think directly affects the way you act.

Everything we do because we put a greater value in doing it than in not doing it.

Habits happen out of our consciousness and that's why they are potentially dangerous. To first take control of a habit, one has to get fully conscious of what one is doing. Having got conscious about the habit, the important questions to ask about it are: What do I gain by doing this habit?, What would I lose by doing this habit?, What could I lost by not doing this habit?, What could I gain by not doing this habit?, Which of the important values does this habit violate or contradict? And at its place what would you choose to support your important values?

There is no need make any effort to break the old habit as long as you remember to keep bringing the new image (of doing the new habit or not doing the old habit and seeing/feeling all the advantages that come out of it) in mind.

Attempting to change the habits by will power alone is inviting failure.

Be patient with yourself, change one habit at a time and put your attention on how you want to be?

Review #2

This is review #2.

I completely forgot that I have listed some very low-level fundamental goals to achieve and just started spending the days in depression again. Thanks to my consciousness, I get to write this review reminding myself about the goals that I set for myself. Obviously I have to pick a couple or three to get started. I pick the following:

• GTD thing.
• To develop emotional competence.
• Setting SMART long term goals.

As for the GTD thing, I have already bought the necessary things, all I need to do is proceed further with the GTD chapters. I am going to continue jotting down the notes from the GTD book into the Kaizen book and review regularly.

And I am going to start reading the Emotional competence book by Goleman and see whether I find any nuggets in it.

The Intelligent Investor

I was reading The Intelligent Investor by Benjamin Graham. He contends that one who keeps his temperament and invests is more intelligent than the one who knows a lot more but gets swayed by the market fluctuations.

That kind of struck a chord in me (I say this everytime, don't I?). He who keeps his temperament is not only an intelligent investor but also an intelligent survivor. That is probably the real intelligence needed in today's world.